My college student: a lesson in trying harder

I have a college student this semester that I will simply call A.  A sits in the back of the room, is always tardy, never asks any questions, and seems to constantly be doing something other than what he should be doing.  At the start of the semester, I thought it was arrogance and a haughty attitude.  It really got to me, so I finally talked to him during week 5 of class, after he failed to show up for his test the previous week. 

I approached it by asking A if everything was going okay, was he enjoying class, was there anything difficult about it that I might be able to help him with?  It turns out he thought he was the worst person in the class.  He didn't understand all the material, and so it made him shrink into his shell even more (he appears to be very shy and timid), and so he didn't come to the test because he was "sure" he'd fail.  I was shocked that he would think that of himself - doesn't everyone deserve to think the best of themselves?  So we talked about strategies to get him to the place he wanted to be in class.  How could he improve his playing?  How could he improve his music reading?  What kinds of things could I do to help him?  I reminded him that he could always ask me for assistance during class, but he had to ask me and I couldn't read his mind. 

Over the next few weeks, A showed up to class on time.  He started being on task, even though he struggled to do what most everyone else in class was doing.  Whenever I would listen to him or walk by and ask how things were going, he would actually ask me a question:  what is this?  where do my hands go for this?  is this right?  I can't tell you how excited and pleased I was that he was getting involved in class.

Tonight, he showed up for the second test.  He forgot to practice one of the three pieces he needed to have prepared, but the others were definitely C level.  I was very pleased with what I was hearing, because it showed major effort, practice, and improvement on his part.  Yes, it was hard, and yes, it wasn't perfect, but I didn't care - here was A learning!  And I think he enjoyed it too.  I asked him after his test what he thought of his playing and he said "not bad."  For a guy that was so negative at the outset, I think he's come a long way.

Way to go, A!  I hope the other half of your test next week goes just as well or better.  Either way, you've made me realize that sometimes I just need to give people more of a chance to be better people instead of just assuming I know what's going on.  I can't wait to see how you progress through the rest of the semester!